Monday, November 8, 2010

Why do you judge so quickly? 
Not even a minute 
That's how long you've known me 
You think you understand 
Because you've seen the surface 
But my water is far from shallow 
You're just too afraid to dive 
Afraid you'll be trapped 
By the tide 
But I won't let you drown 
No, I swear I won't 
So suck it up 
Swallow your insecurities 
And give me a chance 
I won't let you down 
Oh no, I won't let you drown  

Sunday, November 7, 2010

You say you will love me forever. 
But forevers not something you can't truely guarente, unless of course you can see into eternity. 
In honesty, forever doesn't matter to me. 
And I don't want a contract.  
And I don't want you bound. 
Just love me for the moment. 
Just love me now.  
I will not take for granted our time spent together in this lifetime. 
I will cherish every second. 
And when we part, if we part, I want to remember you as the one who made my heart happy. 
The one who chased away the dark. 
The one who tackled my silly fears with ease. 
And I'm not asking for a contract. 
And I don't want you bound.  
Just love me for the moment. 
Just love me now. 
That's all I'm asking for. 
That's all I want. 
So just love me for the moment. 
Just love me now. 
I refuse to conform to the pale colored houses 
How much do you know about living?
Surely not as much as you pretend to 
You reside in your normailty 
You're like everyobody else 
Never questioning, just following 
How is that working out for you? 
Are you really as happy as you seem? 
Or is that all an act too? 
Living as you do, I couldn't take it 
So I will pick up a brush 
And I will paint my house all the colors of expression  
I've only seen this once before 
On the bathroom floor 
When I opened the door  
He was only twenty-four 
I thought of the day 
When I heard him say
What I never in a million years expected him to say 
"What's the point of living? I can't do this anymore!" 
And in that moment I could tell his heart tore 
I didn't know what to do
So I kept my mouth shut and looked down at my shoe 
I was stupid and young
I could have stopped him if I wouldn't have just kept my tongue 
But he's gone now 
And I made my brother a silent vow 
That I'd live my life the way he didn't know how 
But now my hands are shaking 
And my eyes are aching   
As I take in the scene before me 
I can't believe what I see 
The girl is staring back at me 
A single tear falls from her eye 
And I can see her life passing by 
As she waits to die 

The girl closes her eyes, and to my reflection, I whisper an overdue goodbye.  
She makes you love what you hate 
And hate what you love 
She's everything you don't want 
But she's what you have to have 
But can't you see 
That I love what you love 
And that I love you 
And that you could love me too 
It's right there 
Right in front of you're face 
But you keep chasing the girl that'll never want you  
You make me hate what I love 
And love what I hate  
You make the corners of my mouth fall 
You make my heart cry 
My eyes, too 
Even though it's right there 
Right in front of my face 
But I just can't see 
That I keep chasing the boy that'll never want me   
This day, you've made it ever so hard 
What am I supposed to do, buy you a card? 
"Happy Mothers Day, you've always been there for me!" 
No, that's not it 
"Happy Mothers Day Mom, all you've done is strung me along!" 
Ha, hey that does kinda fit 
We've never had a normal Mothers Day, have we Mom?    
In all my years 
Though they may count low 
They are all I know 
You may think I'm bashing 
Oh, to the contrary 
I am provoking 
I am asking you to take up for yourself 
To tell me you love me 
To tell me you DID care 
Tell me, mom 
Tell me 
Tell me I'm wrong
I was all alone in the dark 
And company in this nightmare was merely a wish 
Till you came along, like a shark 
But sadly, I was just a common fish 
The sea 
Was so confused 
As to why you would pick me 
When the entire ocean was at your mercy 
The words you spoke 
Indeed, they were crafty 
Really, you almost had me fooled  
Till you made the mistake of thinking I could be tooled 
You may be a shark 
Buy I refuse to be easy prey 
I'd rather be left in the dark 
And believe me, I WILL make you pay 
You belong with the scum of the pond  
And when I'm through, that's exactly where you'll be 
Because, of you I am the opposite of fond  
Honey, your ass just got PWND ;D
This is not about a vampire, guys.  

Hello, dear 

Have your eyes yet run dry? 

I hear 

Your sweet cry 

It turns my insides 

It feeds my pain  

My hunger abides 

To your blood, as I drain 

I'm sorry I have to keep you here 

But I cannot set you free 

For you see, I fear 

That if I did, you would surely leave me   

You used to make me think I could change   

My ways  

I cannot help but think of how it's strange  

As time passes through the days  

That one simple slip 

Ruined it all 

One little mistake was enough to tip 

Over the fragile glass of us we thought was standing so tall 

Now we're shattered 

But I'm trying to pick up the pieces 

Of your heart, so tattered 

Even though your blood ceases 

To flow 

I will not give up on your life 

I refuse to let you go 

Before it happened I was hoping to make you my wife 

You were my one chance at happiness 

In a world full of strife 

Look at the mess 

Our clothes stained, dark red 

I could have prevented this  

If only I would have fed 

Before hand, oh how I wish 

I could turn back, to a time when you weren't dead 


You're not dead yet! 

Stop hanging your head so low 

It's gonna be fine, don't fret 

I look into your eyes 

Trying not to notice what's obvious 

They have no life, your ties 

To this world have been 

Violently cut 

I've committed the most terrible sin 

I shut 

My eyes, and wish the scene away 

But it's already been done 

And now I must pay 

I can no longer run 

From my mistakes 

I cannot hide from my past 

My former mates 

The ones that didn't last 

I am a monster 

My life can no longer be 

So my own death, I will now foster 

I grasp the blade 

And fulfill my deed 

The color fades 

And you're all I need 

So I take you in my arm 

And kiss your cheek 

Knowing I can do you no more harm 

I'm growing week 

And I hear your cries 
In my memory 

As I too, sever my ties 

My blood flows in a swift whirl

And I take my final bow

Goodnight, my sweet dead girl. 

I am with you now. 
Pure impulse 
Flowing through my vaines 
Making me say and do unspeakable things 
Reign me in 
I can't take the pain anymore 
Find a way to save me, fix me 
I'm not myself 
Help me 
The devil took control 
And I can't get it back 
He whispers in my ear 
Addresses me as 'Dear' 
And softly commands 
Demands I cannot bare to hear 
So I obey 
Praying he'll not come back another day 
Hoping to end this cycle  
This destructive fucking cycle 
He's killing me 
And everyone just sits back and watches  
Not many people know of you 
Yet you are my number one 
I obey your wish
I have no control
I cannot stop 
You have my will 
It's in your hands 
You make me cry 
You tear me down 
You ruin my life 
I don't want you 
But I need what you give me 
You came on slowly 
And I let you grow stronger 
Till I had no say 
No inner power 

Why won't you leave? 
Can't you see what you've done to me? 

What you continue to do? 
Where did you come from?
What caused you? 
You fill the empty spot I never knew was there 
Now I'm falling and you don't even care 

I cannot quit you  
I make no progress 
Only feeble attempts 

Hello, drug 
Nice to meet you, I'm addicted

I stare at my bare reflection 
You're all over me 

Look what you've done! 
You've made me hideous! 

You're never going away, are you? 
Nothing can fix what you've broken. 

You will always be a part of my life 
Even if I find the strength to break up with you 

Even if my wounds heal 
The scars will remain still 
Till my flesh rots away 

At least will you do me one favor? 
Will you be my mine? 

If they see what you did, they won't wanna touch me 
Please don't take love from me, too 

If you're going to stay 
You might as well make yourself comfortable
They say you're no good 
That you'll kill me 
Is this true? 
I don't believe it! 
We'll show them 
We'll be alright 
It's you and me against the world, baby 

I'm growing tired 
Will you tuck me in? 
Hold me tight and kiss me goodnight? 

No, wait 
No, this isn't right! 

You are my enemy 
We cannot be together
I'm sorry, 
But were through 

I've finally found the inner power 
I now have everything I need 
To quit you 

Question is, now what do I do?    
Every man has a Cinderella. 
His heart is like a shoe, so to speak. 
A unique shoe, that only fits one girl perfecty. 
Many girls are capable of wearing this shoe, but it takes endeavor. 
His Cinderella fits into the shoe effortlessly.   
Get out of here, my dear. 
I'll rip you apart, I swear. 
Sweetie, I'm that girl you think you want until you have her. 
My laughing eyes, they draw you in. 
My smile, it makes your palms sweaty. 
But you see, that's only my clever disguise. 
I make you think I am who I am not. 
In truth, behind this smile, you will find too much pitiful luggage for two, let alone one person to carry. 
You confess to me your secret. 
Oh, you like me, do you? You think you're falling in love? 
You are such an innocent fool. 
Who exactly do you think I am? 
Who I am is a stranger to you. 
I've hidden myself behind these lies and this facade and this fifty foot wall. 
Oh god, I just want to save you.
You are different from the others. 
I don't want to hurt you.  
I don't want you honey, oh but I do.  
But I fear that I will take hold of your heart, grip it tight, and hold on till there's nothing left. 
That I will drain you, like a vampire, of any emotion other than sorrow. 
I will feed on your happiness till there is no more. 
And when you're out, and my source is dry, I will move on to my next victim. 
I don't mean to do these things. 
I really don't, I swear. 
It just comes naturally to me. 
This is who I am. 
This is me.
So you see, I am far from the person I pretend to be. 
That girl you think you love doesn't exist. 
And underneath it all, you will only find me.
People say you're born and then you die 
But there's so much more in between 
Oh, so much more you haven't seen 
If you just take a look around 
Just step outside 
Take in a breath of fresh air 
Notice the forgotten 
Hear the song of your ancestors land 
See the beauty you never knew possible 
Smell the wind blowing from the tops of trees 
Taste the sunshine on your tongue  
Feel the spirit of life flowing through your body   
Living isn't as hard as you like to think 
If you don't believe me, get away from the city on a full moon night 
Sit under the stars, I can assure you it's a lovely sight 
Leave behind your worries and fears 
There's no need for that here 
Just enjoy what each and every one of you was lucky enough to be given and use it wisely. 

Sincerely, Your Chance at Life